| September 30,
2003... Downward
Spiral |
I'm thinking about redesigning the comic a little. I
thought arranging the panels in a spiral would be a clever
touch, but it just makes the comic tougher to read than
necessary, even with the arrows indicating the sequence of the
panels. The unique format also forced me to shrink the
comic down, obscuring both its detail and the text in the
speech bubbles.
I don't really regret experimenting with Zoo Logic, because
when I find something that works, the comic improves.
However, even the bad ideas offer valuable experience... I'll
know what not to do when laying out next week's episode.
| September 29,
2003... Send Me an
Angel |
It turns out that there's a lot more to Psikyo's The Fallen
Angels than I thought. A strategy guide was recently
published on GameFAQs which states that the game was supposed
to have two extra characters, which were clipped out of the
final release due to time and budget constraints. Also,
the author claims that the game's character designer migrated
to SNK shortly after The Fallen Angels was released.
When you consider how strongly Cool and Harry Ness resemble
their King of Fighters counterparts, K Prime and Maxima,
that's not really a surprise.
The best part is that the author of the FAQ found all the
moves in the game that I couldn't. I'm going to ask him
for permission to print the commands for those moves here on
the Blitz... if he says no, I'll respect his decision, but if
he says yes, my The Fallen Angels strategy guide will be
finished at last! And that, my friends, will be awesome
indeed.
| September 27,
2003... RIP George
Plimpton |
After days of suffering with stuffed up sinuses, excessive
phlegm, and the dreaded sore throat, I think I'm finally on
the road to Wellville... without the enemas, I hope.
As you know, I didn't post an update yesterday. I
passed up a pretty big opportunity, because a lot of important
stuff happened that day. To recap:
1) Square's long awaited sequel to Final Fantasy VII will
be a film, not a game. Of course, since the disc will
still be playable on your PS2 and because Final Fantasy VII
consisted primarily of cut scenes, full-motion video, and
fifteen minute long magic spells, it's doubtful that anyone
will notice.
2) Capcom announced that its latest installment in the
Street Fighter series, Street Fighter II Hyperfighting X, will
be little more than Super Street Fighter II with a selection
of slightly different fighting styles for each
character. These characters won't be redrawn, and no new
fighters will be included in the game. Suddenly, Capcom
vs. Sammy is starting to look a lot more appealing.
3) Sports writer George Plimpton, who spent much of his
free time in the early 80's antagonizing Atari 2600 owners
with a series of commercials demonstrating the superiority of
the Intellivision, died at the age of 73. It'd be easier
to believe that he died of natural causes if Atari fans
weren't still bitter about those ads.
Now that you've been informed of the latest industry news,
you can loosen that tie, kick off your shoes, and read my
latest cartoon reviews... right here.
| September 25, 2003... Get
Down with the
Sickness |
Still sick, dudes. Hopefully I'll shake this cold
over the weekend.
| September 24,
2003... Frankie Says
Emulax |
I'm sick. Again. Good golly Miss Molly, I'm
getting tired of this crap.
Well, enough about my misery. If you're interested in
boosting the nostalgia of your favorite arcade games, you
might want to give Emulaxian a try. It's a MAME frontend
that uses a polygonal playfield to simulate an actual
arcade. It's a pretty cool idea, but it's not without
its faults... it's exceedingly difficult to configure and
requires a pretty fast computer (I can just barely get by with
my 1.0G Duron, if that gives you any idea). Still, if
you long for the days when there was an arcade on every
corner, rather than just one in every big city, you're going
to want this program. Download it from this site... and
for maximum realism, you'll want to get some arcade cabinet
models and marquees to go along with it.
| September 23,
2003... Jumping Jack
Flash |
I'm playing, or should I say, trying to play, Jumping
Flash! 2 on a variety of Playstation emulators, and none of
them seem capable of handling it. It looks like I'll
have to break out the Playstation 2 to get the most out of
this one. I really hate to do that, but I can already
tell that it'll be worth it for this game. The opening
movie alone is wonderfully lighthearted and funny, qualities
that are noticably absent from many of today's video
games.
| September 22,
2003... Out to Lunch (also, miscellaneous
site updates) |
Whew... I'm a little behind, as always. I planned on
publishing two great articles from my contributors this week,
but I only managed to finish the layout for one of them.
There's still work to be done on Carl Schafer's still untitled
feature on video games inspired by popular comic books, but
I'm confident that it's worth publishing even in its current
unpolished state.
It'll be a while before I'm finished with the design for
Tony Bueno's eye-opening (and ever so slightly controversial)
column about racism in video games. Once that's done,
I'll run an exclusive report on the most incredible garage
sale I've found in years. Here's a sneak peek at just
one of the many cool items I found there...
[Dragon's Lair lunchbox]
I never liked the game, but I give the lunch box a big
thumbs up!
| September 19,
2003... Hatcher Hears a
Hen |
It's clear from the constant advertising on Cartoon Network
that Sega has high hopes for Billy Hatcher and the Giant
Egg. I'm not convinced that the publicity will pay
off for them, but for Sega's sake I hope the game is a big
hit. They could really use one right now.
| September 18,
2003... MUGEN
Misgivings |
To MUGEN or not to MUGEN... I still don't know the answer
to this question. Last night, I downloaded a King of
Fighters game created with MUGEN. Although it was packed
with characters and backgrounds, and it was more complete than
the majority of MUGEN games, it still wasn't as satisfying as
playing an honest to goodness King of Fighters title designed
by SNK. The control was mushy, and many of the
characters' fighting styles had been completely changed.
For reasons I have yet to comprehend, Heidern's standard
special attacks were replaced with Kazuki's fire spirits from
Samurai Shodown IV. I would have been much happier if
they'd just kept him faithful to the original.
If you'd like to grab a copy of King of Fighters: ZEV, you
can get it from this link. But the downloads are
obscenely large, so I wouldn't really recommend it unless
you're a big fan of the series who's dying to see Terry Bogard
from Fatal Fury square off against his older counterpart from
Garou: Mark of the Wolves.
| September 17,
2003... The Next Game Boy (also, SNK vs.
Capcom stuff) |
Word on the street is that Nintendo is already designing a
new Game Boy system, intended to compete against the portable
Playstation slated for release next year. I've got to be
honest, though... I'm not sure I'm ready to upgrade to a new
handheld system. I'm perfectly happy with my Game Boy
Advance, and I don't see that changing any time soon.
The worst part is that since Nintendo is going toe to toe
against Sony, it's inevitable that their new portable will be
specifically designed to play 3D games... games I don't
particularly enjoy. The Game Boy Advance has been, for
the most part, a safe haven for old school gamers hoping to
escape from the deluge of clumsy polygonal action games and
first person shooters on home consoles. Unfortunately,
there will be no place to hide once the new Game Boy is
released.
On a happier note, I discovered from Insert Credit that SNK
vs. Capcom: SvC Chaos has a character who can transform her
opponents into animals. You'll find each character's
furry alter ego here. Some of the transformations are
quite appropriate: for instance, Mai morphs into a cow,
drawing even more attention to her udders, and Earthquake
changes from a big fat pig to, well, a big fat pig. On
the other hand, some of the alternate forms just leave me
scratching my head. Dan Hibiki trades in his trademark
pink gi for a wrinkly hippopotamus skin, and Terry Bogard,
often referred to as the legendary wolf of the Fatal Fury
series, becomes a fuzzy raccoon instead. Strangest of
all was watching the macho war hero Guile literally turn
chicken... I guess the designers saw a link between his
oversized crest of hair and a rooster's comb.
I can't wait to play SNK vs. Capcom, but you won't have to
wait for John Roche's review of Tohkon Road 2: New
Generation. You'll find it right here.
| September 16,
2003... California Here I
Come |
Yeesh. I left you waiting a while for this update,
didn't I? I was going to hasten things up a bit by
running an old episode of Zoo Logic, but at the insistance of
one of my readers, I went ahead and made a fresh comic.
I hope it was worth the wait.
Oh yeah, I just thought I should remind everyone that
there's only two weeks left before the California Raisins
contest ends. If you want that watch, you'd better get
your tail in gear and send in your entry!
| September 13,
2003... Eight Simple Rules for Instant
Cancellation |
I've heard that ABC plans to continue the television show
Eight Simple Rules (for dating my blah blah blah... you get
the idea) in the absence of its star, the late John
Ritter. It's not quite as tacky as Vince McMahon
continuing a pay-per-view wrestling event after it claimed the
life of Owen Hart, but it's still in remarkably poor
taste. Who knew that Donald Duck was part vulture?
The worst part is that the man who inspired the show, a
newspaper columist who was the template for John Ritter's
character, is still very much alive. If they decide to
address Ritter's passing in a Very Special Episode, the
creator of the series will be able to witness his own
fictionalized funeral. It just doesn't get much creepier
than that.
Anyway, Tony Bueno was kind enough to send some articles
for the site. You'll find the first of them, a review of
the XBox game Dead to Rights, here.
| September 12,
2003... Sammy vs. Capcom (also, fighting game
crossovers) |
I'm starting to think that Capcom's stretching the concept
of crossover games a little thin. Marvel vs. Capcom was
a brilliant idea, and Capcom vs. SNK was the clash of video
game titans that everyone had waited years to see.
However, I can't imagine how they'll make their next crossover
game, Sammy vs. Capcom, work. The key to the success of
previous Vs. games was that Capcom's rivals had an extensive
selection of well established, memorable characters that lend
themselves well to the fighting game genre. The only
thing of value Sammy can contribute to this proposed game is
the cast of Guilty Gear... all their other properties, ranging
from the embarassing Survival Arts and Death Crimson to a
handful of nudie pachinko games, would be entirely out of
place.
Capcom should just bury the hachet with Sega and create a
fantastic fighting game featuring both companies' best
characters. Shinobi vs. Strider? Sonic vs. Mega
Man? Fighting Vipers' Bahn vs. Batsu and Sakura from
Rival Schools? Oh yeah, I'd play that... and I'll bet a
lot of other people would, too.
| September 11,
2003... Space Invaders Collection
Perfection |
You'll notice a conspicuous absence of any 9/11 tributes on
this site. It's not out of disrespect for the victims of
the attack... everyone who lost friends and loved ones in the
incident has my sympathy. I've just grown weary of the
shameless opportunism and bandwagon patriotism I've seen since
the twin towers collapsed. Politicians have taken
advantage of the tragedy for too long, affixing words like
"patriot" and "freedom" to laws that in reality compromise
American freedoms and are anything but patriotic. When
you let yourself be manipulated by 9/11 rhetoric, you've once
again become a victim of the tragedy. It's time to let
it go, people.
Anyway, I've got great news for ColecoVision fans. Eduardo
Mello's exceptional Space Invaders Collection is complete and
being sold on the web site Opcode Games. It's a
fantastic translation of both Space Invaders and its sequel,
and includes everything from a professional quality box to a
slickly designed instruction booklet, laid out by Dale Crum
and written by yours truly. You really ought to pick up
a copy of this game... at just $25, the price is right, and I
can assure you that you'll love every minute of it.
| September 10,
2003... All Aboard the Soul Calibur
Train |
In "neener neener neener" news, I've heard the GameCube
version of Soul Calibur II has outsold the others by a huge
margin, about 5:1 by some estimations. Its inclusion of
Link has been a huge draw for Nintendo fans, curious to see
how the little guy will fare outside his natural
environment.
After years of enjoying exclusive titles ranging from Tomb
Raider II to Grand Theft Auto III, it would appear that
Playstation 2 owners are finally getting the short end of the
stick. They're forced to slum with Tekken's Heihachi,
described by cranky Internet personality Maddox as "a
seventy-five year old grandfather" whose most powerful special
move involves "sitting in a rocking chair on a porch, giving
out Werther's Originals."
Somewhere in the middle is the X-Box with its own exclusive
character, Todd McFarlane's decaying do-gooder Spawn.
I've never been especially fond of Spawn's other games, but I
don't see the harm in adding him to a release that's already
proven itself in arcades. And to the people who say
Spawn doesn't fit in with the rest of the cast... you DO
remember Voldo and Astoroth, right?
| September 9,
2003... Comic-Kaze |
In case you're wondering why I didn't update yesterday, I
was sick. Bo Rai Cho sick, if that gives you any
idea. Fortunately, I was able to finish the Potato
Festival photo spread over the weekend. It's a little
self-indulgent and not at all relevant to the topic of video
games, but hey, I'm the editor... I can get away with this
stuff every now and then!
Next on the menu is Carl Schafer's feature about video
games starring popular comic book characters. I just
need to format the article, add in some pictures, and create a
title graphic. I skimmed through the feature over the
weekend and found myself laughing through the whole
thing. I'm sure you'll enjoy it as much as I did.
| September 6,
2003... Jason Voorhees, the
Ever-Living |
The festival's starting to pick up... a little,
anyway. I had the chance to watch a band called Badd
Seed perform last night but I just didn't have the energy to
make it. Hopefully they'll be back for a repeat
performance later tonight.
Anyway, Chris Farrington of 11 Will Die recently reviewed
the NES versions of Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm
Street, in honor of the recent theatrical release of Freddy
vs. Jason. He also revealed the ending to Friday the
13th, and aggravatingly enough, Jason manages to survive your
repeated attacks. It's bad enough that the game expects
you to defend yourself with a handful of rocks. It's
even worse that you have to bludgeon the relentless zombie
into submission with them not once, not twice, but THREE times
to win the game. It's downright inexcusable for the game
to snatch that hard earned victory from you by letting you
know that no, you DIDN'T kill the last boss, and yes, the
hours you spent struggling to win were wasted. It's no
wonder that when people talk about horrible Nintendo games,
"Friday", "the", and "13th" are the first three words out of
their mouths.
| September 5,
2003... I Do Not Have a
Tuber! |
The first day of the Potato Festival wasn't all that
exciting, even for a potato festival. Nothing had been
set up yet, so all I found were a half dozen garage sales
scattered throughout town. I picked up some pretty good
deals, though, including this amusing find...
[Rocky and Bullwinkle for the NES,
with a big hole punched through it]
Normally, I'd chalk this damage up to carelessness on the
part of the original owner, but I've played this game.
I'm quite sure the hole punched into this Rocky and Bullwinkle
cartridge was intentional, most likely during a fit of
frustration after being tagged repeatedly by a nigh impossible
to avoid Boris Badenov.
It gets better! You're not going to believe who was
in charge of producing this game. It's Howard
Phillips... the same Howard Phillips that used to be company's
spokesman throughout the late 80's. How he wound up at
T*HQ is anyone's guess, but I suspect the years of bad karma
he built up from humiliating Nester finally came back to haunt
him.
| September 4,
2003... Puttin' On the
Hits |
I'd like to thank everyone for their support of the
Blitz. The hit count has been astronomical over the past
week and I've received some fantastic reviews from my
contributing staff. I've even had multiple offers for
server space, in case I decide to move the site from
Overclocked.
Well, I'm off to enjoy my little town's annual Potato
Festival. You might even see an article about it in a
few days, since it's the kind of wacky, wild crap I like to
cover on the site. In the meantime, check out John
Roche's reviews of Family Guy and Transformers: Armada on the
cartoon page!
| September 3,
2003... Pop-Up
Video |
The good news is, I've finally got something to rant
about. The bad news? It's got nothing to do with
video games.
I'm talking about the pop-ups on this site. They've
gotten so thick that they're even starting to annoy ME.
I'm not sure if I've ever mentioned this before, but I don't
receive a penny from the ads on this site. I don't even
have any control over their content, so it goes without saying
that I don't support or endorse the products offered in these
ads.
Now, it IS true that I agreed to run advertising on this
site in exchange for server space. That was two years
ago, when the Internet economy was much healthier and all I
needed was a single small banner at the top of the page.
Since that time, the ads on this site have gotten
progressively more intrusive and bothersome, evolving from
that single banner to a total of two obnoxious pop-ups,
hawking products that are wholly inappropriate for this
site. I don't have an enormous number of readers, but
it's pretty safe to assume that there are teens visiting The
Gameroom Blitz, and they don't need to see commercials for
discount tobacco products. Frankly, I don't support
tobacco use for anybody, and I'm a little offended that those
ads are here in the first place.
Another negative side effect to the advertising is that
it's driving away readers, and discouraging other sites from
linking to this one. I've talked to Brandon Sheffield of
Insert Credit about his linking to the Blitz, and he flatly
refused for the simple reason that there are pop-up ads
here.
So not only am I not benefitting from the advertising in
any way, it's crippling this site and its chances of finding
an audience. On top of THAT, I can't control either the
content or the frequency of the ads, making it seem as though
I'm responsible for drowning the reader in objectionable
advertising. Something's got to change.
I should make clear that I'm not blaming David Lloyd for
this. He's been great to me ever since he agreed to host
the site, offering me complete autonomy and an easy method for
uploading files. Frankly, I don't think he has any more
control over the situation than I do, which is why I don't
want to bail out on him. If there's a way I can keep the
site on Overclocked and reduce the number of ads on the Blitz
(preferably to nil), I'll do it.
| September 2,
2003... The Missing
Link |
If you guys notice any broken links or missing images, be
sure to let me know, all right? I wish I had something
else to say, but I haven't really been keeping up with the
video game industry lately. I guess I'll just rest on my
laurels for the moment and wait until I find something worth
ranting about.
| September 29,
2003... Back in the Saddle
Again |
After an extended hiatus, The Gameroom Blitz is back!
You'll probably notice I've made a few changes to the
site. First off, the site logo is brand new... I've
designed it myself, without borrowing graphics from classic
video games like Gunstar Heroes. I like it so much that
it will become a permanent fixture at the top of the front
page. However, I will spice up the banner a bit with
memorable game quotes and the occasional fun surprise.
Next, I've taken my readers' advice and streamlined the
front page. You've probably noticed the updates are a
lot easier to find now that all the clutter at the top of the
page has been moved to the bottom. Also, the navigation
bar to your left is more clear than it was in previous
incarnations of the Blitz... there are no cryptic icons; just
a series of clearly labelled links, arranged by category.
You'll find nearly everything you liked about The Gameroom
Blitz in this new version of the site, but I have done away
with a couple of features. The Wishful Thinking section
of Advance Theory has officially been retired... it took
entirely too much work to make those mock screenshots.
Besides, most of what's been released on older systems
(particularly the Super NES) is going to wind up on the Game
Boy Advance anyway. Also, there will no longer be cute
backgrounds for the counter. To be perfectly frank, I
was thinking about getting rid of the counter entirely.
I changed my mind about that at the last minute, but one thing
I do know for sure is that this particular counter's days on
the Blitz are numbered. TheCounter's basic services have
become much too basic now that they demand to be paid for
nearly everything they do.
You'll barely notice they're gone when you see what I've
put in their place. The Blitz is now sponsoring monthly
contests... this month, we're giving away a California Raisins
watch, in honor of the Lost Levels' release of the NES
game. If you think playing a game starring those
fruit-flavored African-American stereotypes is fun, just wait
until you put one of 'em on your wrist! I'm
serious. The watch is more fun than the game, which
should tell you just how good the game is (read: not at
all).
I'll also find other ways to get readers more involved with
the site. Until then, enjoy the new look and the new
articles, and count on finding more great stuff here in the
near
future.